October 30

What Causes Attraction Between Man and Woman

Relationships & Society


Have you ever been in an interaction where you don’t know if someone likes you or not?

You make eye contact, things are going well and then it all fades into oblivion and your left feeling super awkward and majorly confused. 

Did the alcohol wear off... 

...or was it more of the case of chalk and cheese?

Either way, this entire mating landscape can be downright confusing and SERIOUSLY difficult to navigate.

But, what if you’re already in a relationship? 

How do you continue to feel that ‘hot teenage sex’ vibe after the 1000th time of doing it?

Let’s get real here…

Without attraction most relationships are fucked. 

Some people call bullshit on this, but if you still want to get down and dirty then there needs to be at least some kind of attraction present. 

So, let’s take a deep dive into what causes attraction between man and woman.


Ok, lets go...

What is attraction between man and women?

Attraction between man and women is a mixture of three things:

  • Biological
  • Physical
  • Energetic

These three forces combine to create attraction.

Attraction is often referred to as chemistry. A pull. Magnetic. 

No matter what you want to call this ‘feeling’, when you experience it, you sure as hell know all about it. 

You feel excited, energised and alive. 

And, when it’s gone you feel withdrawn, desperate and needy. 

The ping of butterflies, the shortness of breath, and the overwhelming sense of desire can all feel so fucking good.

Who doesn't love a good Hollywood fairytale?

However, attraction isn’t just biological, or physical. 

It turns out it’s a little more complicated than that. 

Attraction is less about biology, and physical attraction, yet more about the energetic magnetism between two individuals (or more if you’re feeling frisky 😉)

Attraction is more about the energy you embody at your core essence.

Attraction between man and woman is the delicate dance of masculine and feminine energies (not based on gender) polarising one another. 

The more opposed the masculine and feminine sexual energies are, the stronger the attraction. 

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Just like a magnet, the attraction pulls the two opposing energies together. 

Another word for this is polarity, and polarity is the secret cocktail that’s the route cause of attraction between man and woman.

What is Polarity?

The Law of Polarity is one of the The Twelve Spiritual Laws of the Universe that impact us in every aspect of our lives.

Each of these 12 Laws teach us something unique about our well-being, happiness, and success.

The Law of Polarity states that everything that exists has an equal and exact opposite. 

For Example:

On the love/hate spectrum, you can have extreme love or hate, or different feelings between these two opposite ends of the pole, such as dislike, and so on.

The exact principle applies to our own energy. 

While we all embody both masculine and feminine energies (we tend to lean towards one predominantly).

For Example:

If we hold a more feminine energy then we will attract a more masculine energy and vice versa.

This sexual polarity is what causes attraction between a man and woman. 

However, if there is little energetic polarity between two individual, then the attraction fade's away..

The key is to become mindful of your true core essence and not let any limited beliefs, unworthiness or fear cause you to wear a mask and embody the wrong energy frequency. 

How is attraction between man and women formed?

Attraction between man and woman is formed when we meet someone whose energy opposes our own, that we’re physically and biologically attracted to. 

This attraction can happen in an instant, or may develop over a period of time. 

"Love maybe a mystery…

...but attraction is a science"

Science tells us that it takes just 3 seconds to know whether or not we are physically attracted to someone upon meeting them for the first time.

Scientific studies have shown that when we first encounter a new person our brain is processing one of two things;

  1. 1
    Working out through our Paracingulate Cortex whether we think they are hot.
  2. 2
    Deciding through our Rostromedial Prefrontal Cortex whether we are compatible

This tells us that attraction happens in an instant, and we’re all shallow as fuck.

Which in a lot of ways makes sense.

Think about it this way...

If attraction took ages to develop then chances of our species surviving would decrease. 

But what really is at play is our biology. The body's innate desire to want to reproduce. 

These biological responses from the body creates physical attraction. 

But is it all based upon biology? or can attraction be formed over a period of time?

In short the answer is yes.

When we first meet someone, it’s more likely our mask is on. 

As we become more comfortable, we start to let go of our mask and we begin to embody our true essence and our true authenticity.

It’s through this authenticity that real sexual polarity is able to occur. 

I know in my own life that attraction with women hasn’t necessarily been instant. 

Which makes sense on a biological level. 

However, over longer periods of time (as the mask has been dropped and authenticity has been able to shine through), attraction has formed where it previously didn’t exist.

It’s more like as a friendship develops emotionally, so too can the attraction.

However, with men it’s more instant (for me personally at least). More physical, hence biological. 

Attraction can’t be forced.

You either have for someone, or you don’t.

Instead of trying to force things, try placing more of your focus on yourself and your authenticity, and embody your true essence.  In doing so, you will organically attract someone with the opposite/ opposing energy. 

Why is attraction between man and women important?

Attraction in any romantic relationship whether between the same sex or a heterosexual is vital for your sex life.

We all need sex. It’s that simple. 

Attraction creates the desire to want to have the physical intimacy. 

When we first form a relationship the attraction and sexual polarity is at it's peak, however, over time this attraction begins to dwindle and the energy depolarises. 

This depolarisation leaves most relationships in the friend zone (if your lucky).

Over time, women lose there femininity, and instead take on far more masculine character traits, and visa versa for the men.

And, in the end, both lose all polarities, and you end up like these two below...

If you’re ever wearing matching shell suits in your relationship… you’re fucked! 


This is an absolute no-go zone.


You both embody the exact same energy (usually masculine), and there is ZERO SEXUAL POLARITY. 

"Would you like a cup of tea love..."

"Yes please".

"Would you like to make out?"


It's that simple.

Without sexual polarity in your relationship, you're basically just friends.  And, that's just fine. However, if you want to make things a bit more exciting and inject that teenage lust back into your relationship, you've got to actively seek out opportunities to create space, and polarity back into your relationship…

We all want to be in relationships that are healthy, fun and wholesome, where both parties feel alive, wanted and desired. 

Not bored, stale and tense. 


Attraction between a man and a woman is a complex subject, however, understanding what causes attraction between man and woman will allow you to keep your relationships exciting, lustful, and most importantly, fun.

Now that you know what these attraction triggers are go out and have a little fun with them, experiment, and be the witness of how they operate in your life. 

Are there any points that I have missed? If so comment below and we will get the conversation started. 

With love


About the author 


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